letting God lead

I've heard many people talk about how God has "led" them or directed them or "told" them what to do.  I, too, have experienced God's leading and have often made comments about how God guided me into a particular direction.  It's not an uncommon thing for followers of God to testify to His leading. But when you take a path that doesn't seem natural to the onlookers, skeptics will ask fair questions like:  Well, how do you know that God led you there?  How does He speak to you?  Are you sure it's God and not your own heart?  How can you tell the difference?

There will be a lot of questions even from those who already walk with God, and have heard His voice too.  But unless you can give them an answer, skeptics will continue to make judgments about your life and your choices.  And I suppose that's all fine and well since we shouldn't care what others think of us anyway, right?  But what happens when we are our own worst critic?  What happens when I'm the one questioning my understanding of God's guidance and doubting His care for me?  Well, I'll tell you what happens.  I end up imploding, that's what.  I end up rejecting God's presence and direction in my life and when I do that, I deny His authority in my own life and essentially tie His hands behind His back.

1 Peter 3:15 says, Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. 

I have given this matter much thought and prayer and am prepared to give a simple answer to those that have asked me direct questions, as well to myself so that I can remain firm in my faith.

What does it mean when God speaks to me?

No, I don't hear an audible voice.  I'm sure it would be rather frightening if I did.  But one way I can explain it is to liken it to something more common, like a craving. When I was pregnant with my firstborn I had ridiculously strong cravings for grapefruit juice.  I HAD to have it.  The craving didn't go away if I ignored it; it actually got worse and worse.  It wasn't the same as a craving for a cookie after lunch.  Those kinds of minor cravings will usually disappear if you can get over the initial temptation.  No, this was intense; obviously something my body required during that time.

Sometimes God puts a craving in my spirit that I just have to address otherwise it won't go away.  Like in regard to prayer for others. I'm doing my own thing when suddenly someone is weighing heavy on my mind and heart and the desire and the direction to pray for them is strong and it doesn't go away until I pray.  The direction to pray for someone is an easy one because by praying I'm not really doing any damage so it doesn't hurt to follow what I perceive to be God's direction.

But sometimes, He leads me in a life direction and I need to know, with certainty, that He's the navigator.  And the truth is, we can never have concrete confidence because we walk by faith and not by sight.  But there are means by which to test the direction.

For example, there are times when we experience "impressions" for a direction that I would liken to an itch.  When God puts an itch in my spirit, my initial reaction, as a child of God is, "Okay God, anything for you."  But then I get my toes in the water just a bit and realize exactly what God is asking of me and that's when my sinful human nature kicks in and I back off with, "Um, on second thought, I don't think so."  But the itch doesn't go away and every time I meet with God, the itch gets stronger and stronger.  And that's how I know it's Him that is leading.  I can test this theory (and I have, an embarrassing amount of times).  I will preoccupy myself with the world's distractions (as an attempt to escape) and suddenly the direction that God had for me becomes dim and unimportant.  And I get feelings and thoughts like, "I'm sure God didn't really ask me to do that.  How silly of me to even think that God would speak to me. What a relief; I'm off the hook."  But then I return to my devotional time with God and the impression or direction comes back very firmly.

Does that make sense?  Do you understand what I'm saying?  I don't just get "impressions" and then run with them.  There is a scientific process I can use.  I test them against the perspectives of the world and compare them to the perspective of a follower of Jesus.  Because guess what?  Walking by faith is something entirely too foreign for many people, unfortunately.  And it would be helpful to have some testimony that's a bit more concrete than just "I believe."

There are some in my life that witness my bold walk of faith and they assume I am rushing into things and not being careful enough.  But here's me, asking you nicely: please do not mistake my faithfulness to God for recklessness and lack of thought.

Those that know me know that I am capable of overthinking things and trying to approach them a little more scientifically than I should.  But that's something I'm trying to fight against because it negates my statement of faith.  Because the truth is, that if I had shuffled my feet when God led me in the past, I would have an entirely different story today.  A story filled with so much more pain and regret and wounds.  I know... I remember... I can see... where my walk of faith has led me and I choose to remain faithful to God too.  When God directs me, and the impression is crystal clear when I am fasting, praying and serving, then I will move without hesitation, regardless of what others think of me.

It would just be swell, though, if those that were closest to me had enough confidence in my walk with God to not be the voice of doubt in my ears.  That would just be super cool.